Drake is heading out in three hours on yet another business trip. *Sigh* I hate it when he's gone. You'd think I'd get used to it though. Hopefully he'll be home for Cole's birthday next month. I can't believe my little Valentine is turning 4!!! I think Drake has about three or four business trips in the next two or three months...each lasting about a week or so depending on what they need him for. I'm grateful that they aren't sending him off to Iraq though. Drake's coworker is there now and has been there for about two months and will be there for the next three months. I can't imagine Drake being gone for that long...especially in such a dangerous area. I suppose that's why they send the single guys out there though. I know that Drake's coworker does it for the extra pay (overtime, hazard pay, etc.) because he wants to save up enough money to buy a home, then find a wife and settle down. I hope that he is able to get what he wants out of life. I know he doesn't enjoy doing what he's doing now, but he sees it as a necessary evil to get the things in life that he wants. I admire him for that.

So, five more days without hubby. I can do it. Maybe I'll even get the house clean while he's gone. I swear having him home is like having another child sometimes. Don't get me wrong, he can be VERY helpful when he wants to be...he just doesn't always want to be, it seems. Sometimes I think these trips are good for our relationship. They give us a chance to really think about and realize how much we love and appreciate the other and the things they add to our lives. I think that in the thick of things, we tend to take for granted the good things and focus on the negative. We EXPECT the good things to be there and don't really realize just how much our lives are enriched by eachother, but get pissed off at the little negative things. The time apart really shows us how much we would be missing in our lives if we weren't there for eachother. Sadly, once he gets back, it's back to the daily grind and the negative things start adding up again.

I'm not sure what it is, but our relationship has drastically improved in the past few months. It used to be that we couldn't go a single day without fighting and we would purposely avoid eachother so we could avoid fighting. Drake would often ask me why I spent so much time downstairs when he was upstairs and I would honestly tell him that it was because as long as we weren't together, we could pretend that we were happy, but the moment we spent any time together, all we would do was fight and I didn't want to fight anymore, so it was easier to just not be in the same room as him. What kind of marriage is that?!!?!?! This went on for SO long. We were married, but we never talked...we never spent time together, and when we did, all we did was scream at eachother. It was as though we were roommates...roommates who couldn't stand eachother. I don't know what has changed, but I'm so glad that something has. I honestly wasn't sure how much longer our marriage was going to last. We had spent the majority of our seven years of marriage fighting. It wasn't what I wanted out of life. He wasn't happy. I wasn't happy. The kids weren't happy. Caitlin asked me at least once a week if we were going to get divorced because all we ever did was fight and moms and dads who fight all the time get divorced. I told her no, but I didn't honestly believe that myself. Things are SO much better now though. Now Caitlin has to tell us "Ewwwwwwwww, stop kissing all the time!" I like it much better this way. I honestly haven't been this happy in my marriage in a long, long time. Honestly, I'm not sure I've ever been this happy in my marriage.

Anyways, not much more to write and I have to get off of here to go spend some time with hubby before he leaves. ;)